...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
just to let you know, don't open your linen closet for a while until i come over with a cleaning kit and geek squad
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
my phone vibrated itself into my puke bucket and literally sizzled. you'll have to reach me at this number for a while.
unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
we walked around the neighborhood with caution tape tied around our foreheads, making indian noises. I might have disturbed a crime scene to make a native american headdress.
just cuz theres a goalie doesnt mean i cant commandeer the goal and become a way better goalie
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
I just walked by a dude at the gym covering himself in olive oil.
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
Next time I think it’s a good idea to hook up with any of your wife’s family members or friends just kick me in my dick
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