I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
This is how I know I have no life... Jon and Kate are my emotional roller coaster.
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
Dude. I need you to practice dancing around in your banana hamock. Party boy style. I'll call later with details.
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
Ik youre sleeping but fyi its 5:32am I'm sitting in the middle of the road bra less and shoeless with boxers in my hand and no ride. Shits real crazy.
Randomize
