you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
Whoa!!! Accidentally took a dump in chick's bathroom at Red Robin. 1 hr for coast to be clear. Women's farts sound like geese taking last breath. Liars.
After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot
so I made out with a lobbyist last night. im officially a resident of D.C
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
Hey, did you take me to hospital last night?
I'm riding in a wheelchair, being pulled by a golf cart. You need to be here.
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
Go to hungover. Go directly to hungover. Do not pass go. Do not collect 200 dollars
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
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