I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
I feel like I've been slapped by Gods icy cold dick of vengeance.
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
I don't like getting sloppy drunk but I don't like getting just half drunk either, I'm way too responsible if my blood alcohol level is below 0.2
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
We knew it was an interesting night when we found my thong wrapped around a chocolate chip muffin in the fridge.
We'd like to invite you to our threesome! Lingerie is encouraged and drinks will be provided. Next Friday, roommate night, my bedroom. Hope to see you there!
I've had more sex since the twins moved in than I'd had in the previous four years. They are the best wingman ever.
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
I woke up this morning to find my closet lacking 98% of my clothes and a text from my male roommate saying your dresses squeeze my genitals
i had fun fun last night, with the exception of you running over my foot with your car. makes a great story for my first one night stand.
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
Is there a number of dicks a girl can have in a weekend before it becomes unacceptable? Asking for a friend
Remember! It’sa long weekend and a holiday weekend and it’s America’s birthday! So don’t short change me!
I thought you were asking for a friend
Randomize
