now i know why i became what i already was.
Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
There is something depressing about eating toast in a dark living room by myself using a paper plate that says: "Let's Party!"
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
He's spent his last 3 years working at Urban Outfitters. No, I'm not sad I missed out on a life of mustaches, the dollar menu and shitty scarves.
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
You know you gotta reevaluate your life when the first thought that comes to mind after you wake up is 'at least I'm still alive'
I'm tempted to randomly yell out 'SO HOW IS YOUR UNDERAGE GIRLFRIEND' but that would be callous
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
Woke up with a grilled cheese in my hand, it was like god giving me a high five for the night before
Randomize