Dear tim. Christina farted and it smells like kid roses.
you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
how the FUCK am I supposed to macarena while doubble fisting?
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
I just realized, I'm going to be on my period for the end of the world. FUCK.
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
I just had sex on a roof
He yelled "CARLI LLOYD" and then kicked the cake off the table. Soccer is making monsters out of us.
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
Randomize
