Afterwards she curled up in my dog's bed and slept there all night
How mad was your dog?
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
Accidentally spilled a drink on her roommates skirt, offered to clean it, and got a blowjob out of the deal. Something went horribly right.
She gave me a foot massage with her tongue. I think we're both scarred for life.
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
She just left someone a voicemail saying 'you better not have plans Saturday night, cause I'm going to sit on your face.'
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
It's election day and I was just tied up with an American flag scarf
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
I'm sorry, I'm tired, I can't play long distance cockblock anymore. Good night don't get too pregnant.
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
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