the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
Get this. Chipped my front tooth taking a sip of a gay mans beer out of my cleavage. Fuck my fucking life. that'll be fun to explain to my dentist
on the subway to an interview & there's a dude doing whippits out of a cheese wil can
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
I'm still pretty stoned. There are mini rice cakes in my robe pocket to snack on in the shower.
I found all these half eaten mandarin orange on the ground and the bruises on my neck are definetely not hickies
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
I snapchatted him nudes and he didn't screenshot a single one of them because he's a gentleman.
Why do I have a wristband from the birthing center at the University of Maryland hospital....
I've been sober for almost two weeks and it's been the worst two weeks ever. Even my mom told me I need to start drinking again.
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
Plan before tomorrows interview: wash off green glitter from EVERYWHERE!!!
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