guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
I tried to put a seat belt on in the shower. And I'm 80% sure I ate soap.
It's never too late to be topless.
He slow fucked me. Doggy style. On a porch. You never slow fuck doggy style. Its a law. A LAW.
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
It's a good thing my liver is flexible because a lesser man would be dead
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
Randomize
