the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
doing a walk of shame covered in blue food coloring is only embarrassing if you make it embarrassing...actually no its embarrassing on all accounts
I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again.
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
25 likes of a picture on Instagram of my butthole. beat that.
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
Woke up, bank account is empty. Sock is still full of blood. Nothing in my pockets but a wireless mic and jenga pieces.
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
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