It's like a choose-your-own-adventure. But the adventure is already chosen for you. And it sucks.
he cracked the bottle of jager at 11am and said "hey, its Saturday and I gotta do something"
dude i woke up in a pile of chocolate chips. this has to stop happening
This is the 4 year anniversary of the last time I shit my pants. Let's get drunk...
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
I just figured out that you can toast a marshmallow with a butter knife and a cigarette lighter. I'm like a retarded Mister Wizard
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
My dog just ran downstairs with my vibrator in her mouth... during my dad's birthday dinner.
If I could I'd magically teleport drugs and alcohol to you. Like a bad decision fairy.
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
Randomize
