I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
She's got an ass you could write the declaration of independence on in one line. Takes up three bar stools.
There's some strange man with hair that keeps talking to us. I'm scared.
This is how horror movies start. Going to bar with strange hair guy. He's paying. Bad idea?
Ditched hair man. Got free cab ride to market. Want food. I win.
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
My fuck buddy took time out of his date with his girlfriend to text me happy Valentines Day.
Holy christ fuck what has my trainwreck of a life come to just blew a 17 year old so help me god
His words said "save me", but his penis said "I'll take my chances"
I am sufficiently unimpressed with the options available to my freshly shaved self tonight.
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
Randomize
