i don't plan on having that self control this summer
so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
Just found an unopened tied g of coke on the floor in her room... she thinks the maintenance guy dropped it earlier today. This takes the cake for sketchiest apartment.
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
I call him Seabiscuit because he's my trusty steed
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
You know that you're in a bad spot when the doctor puts you on 500mg of amoxicillin 4 times a day for ten days and puts refills on it...
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
How proud should I be that I googled "dildo with wheels" and actually got the result I wanted?
Fuck my life he IS a stripper, Ive been sleeping with a stripper named Phoenix. damnit, I knew the sex was too good
You almost lost your european virginity to a Peruvian man waering a do-rag in a port-a-potty.
So. Much. Porn.
Randomize
