so, totally just picked up a pack of red bull, and some magnum condoms and the old woman at the register's tone went from "hi blah how are you" to "oh....how YOU DOIN'?" she knew what was up
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
Don't worry, I'm preparing for tonight by lining my purse with a garbage bag.
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
She's not a foreskin expert like you
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
My fucking earlobe is bruised what the hell
There are peanut butter donuts now. We are playing with forces we can't possibly understand.
I will pay you in sex, beer and popcorn if you will come fold my clothes for me.
Add free use of your panini press and its a deal.
Deal.
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
