Hey sorry for feelin' up your date. Sadly, this is a mass txt.
farters have to be the big spoon...
after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
You started laughing mid-cry and when I asked you said, "my tears taste like vodka."
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
Trying not to look at her chest is like trying to not hear a fire engine racing by.
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
I'm at a Tim Horton's and two girls just came in handcuffed to eachother
i think i left you like a 5 minute message about the mcchicken burger i was eating. I think I called wanting sex but the mcchicken burger was a lot more seducing.
Randomize
