By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
totally worth getting kicked out for trying to throw my drink on lindsay lohans ankle bracelet.
all I wanna do is swim in an Olympic sized pool of Gatorade and tylenol.
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
We got banned from that Whataburger for life. WHATABURGER. Which is saying something. They deal with drunk dumbasses every night.
Tequila happens.
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
I've started drunk signing up for 5ks. Who even does that?
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
Happy birthday and sorry I punched your friend in the face
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
I hummed the theme from jaws while she was taking the pregnancy test....needless to say she was not pleased
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
I'm eating Arby's in the bathtub because I'm an adult and I do what I want
Randomize
