I fell asleep with crest white strips on and ate one...
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
She told me I was lying in front of her toilet for an hour saying "lasers."
When did our fuck buddy relationship, turn into me babysitting his dog?
The party invite said "this ain't no lame stoplight party, you come to hookup or you don't come" I feel like their honesty deserves out attendance
Not to mention having our pick at the ensuing sausagefest
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
I just had to explain to a 5 year old why I had fuzzy handcuffs hidden in a macaroni box under my bed.
He's like a Lana del Rey song that took human form
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
I swear, I make more use of my creative writing major with sexting than I do with anything else
I just remembered something from last night. check your closet.
Randomize
