normally I beat off every night before I go to bed even though my little brother sleeps in the same room. So I was starting to last night, and he jumped out of bed and said "Fuck, Im not listening to this shit again" We havent talked since. fuck me
Now that the fun of having an iPhone has worn off I find that using screen as a coke tray is by far my favorite app
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
Should we discuss the rug burns on my back or just save that for a separate conversation
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
Unless your apartment has 3 am pancakes Im not coming over.
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
I woke up to realize my keys were on the front porch. Also so was I. So close yet so far
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
I swear to the sweet baby jesus I didn't fill your freezer with salsa and my little pony toys, but I didn't stop them either.
Out of ten? A seven. You pulled your shorts down to your ankles, jumped into the pool and announced you were a merman.
It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
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