Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
Last night I ate the rest of the salsa with my hands. And i DONT have a hangover? Glorious.
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
Alive...but barely. Had dinner with my parents tonight which was conveniently located near where i left my car, phone, and self respect
It's one of those mornings when I woke up thinking that i really shouldn't have hooked up with my ex boyfriend's girlfriend just to prove a point.
I'm not leaving bed today. And i guess my drunken ass last night hit my roommate in the face with a tiki torch then proceeded to cry while carrying around a picture of he who must not being name. I'm a piece of work.
They are fixing my bike for free, trying to smoke me out, and their kids keep hugging me.
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
You know the cave of wonders in Aladdin? That's how I feel about his apartment. Except with blow and other treasures.
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
Someone needs to lock me in a chastity belt because all my vagina does is get me into trouble. Fuck.
On a scale of 1 to shit show you were "i just pissed myself"
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