Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
took 4 advil with a shot of vodka, figure i'd try to save myself now
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
You told me that you were as fast as lightning and you wanted to race me. Then you faceplanted after falling down the stairs.
So somehow today's lecture on the immune system turned into me having to stand up and explain female ejaculation to the class.
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
my liver is dry heaving
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
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