It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
We watched a biography of Frida Kahlo in class today. It was depressing. A chick with a UNIBROW just put my sex life to shame.
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
Next time I see you, remind me to tell you how I fell through my attic door and landed on my feet in the garage on the first floor.
truck drivers should not leave their trucks unlocked with cigarettes inside when we're drunk and walking around.
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
I thought I was really making her scream. Turns out she had a Lego jammed in her lower back.
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
Randomize
