I don't have a choice really. It's either lose 15 lbs by Halloween, or I'm going as a giant banana.
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
Crashed the mayor's bday party, no list for some reason. Wore suits. Ludacris was there.
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
Wait.....I ate a raw potato lastnight.
I don't remember coming in last night, but apparently I ate a piece of pizza because when I woke up I had pizza crust stuck to the back of my thighs.
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
Wanna get business drunk and go play golf?
Watching South Park, doing sit-ups and drinking tequila. In other words, my night is going pretty good.
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
Randomize
