Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
I swallowed and made him pancakes in the morning. I feel almost as desperate as Jennifer Aniston at this point.
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
it's kinda bad that we're already planning travel arrangements to his funeral
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
I told her it would be awesome. We are all the same people. One of us would always be drunk, one of us would always be hooking up, and one of us would always be crying into a pancake.
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
He gave me a back massage while we were fucking.
Did you get that?
WHILE WE WERE FUCKING.
Hate my fucking roommates.... Seriously, who the FUCK peels potatoes in the bathroom sink?!
Randomize
