You can bone my sister, but I will end our friendship if you write 'LOLERS' one more time at the end of your texts.
she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights.
Tonight will be judged a success if I walk out without having thrown up on my shirt.
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
I told the bartender that his red, white and blue shots were terrible and tasted like Thomas Jefferson's balls.
Then we woke up and they shouted "Emergency Vodka!!" and that's how we got redrunk.
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
Randomize
