one two three fourrrrnication!
The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
The cop refused to sing with us, even though he was as happy as we were that the tow truck finally showed up.
I should start printing out disclaimer handouts and passing them out to people saying, "I can not be held responsible for anything I say or do this evening."
He taught me where the gears in a five speed are with his penis.
Well it was tamer than the 4th of july when I blew that guy I met walking home from the fireworks
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
He left my apartment when I broke up with him just as my booty call was walking in. It was a little awkward...
But here's the wonderful thing about us. It's us. You could invite me over, get really wasted and end up sleeping with someone else and id be there in the morning to take you to breakfast.
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
Well I'm over here squandering a fabulous hair day and radiant complexion
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
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