super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
i feel like my life is a cheap remake of American Pie
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
Why would I send you a picture of it when I could just steal the gnome and put it in your bed with you? Admit it, he looks just like gnomeo!
I like how my motivation to lose weight is so I can wear a nude bikini and get covered in body paint for the tribal party. Priorities.
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
She was drunk at Red Robin. She asked for more fries and then shoved them in her purse while saying "Come on bitches, you're coming with me" to them.
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
Ever been to a strip club with one stripper? I have. And she sucked.
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
Randomize
