Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
i'm surrounded by gay midgets. not sure if i'm bragging or asking you to come rescue me. wait for follow up.
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
You told me you were pretty sure you were god because you knew everything about everyone.
I thought this kinda shit only happens to ugly people
Hi, my name's audrey!
Max?
Sorry, this girl is phone-stealing drunk.
Dude, Taco Bell gave me a free fiesta potatoes when I won a bet on wether I could fit the entire rim of a cup in my mouth.
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
Are you sure you didn't shit in my back yard?
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
He literally lured me in the house with his cat then we ended up fucking on the living room couch while the cat just sat there and watched
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
Randomize