i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
when i start to cry when i lose at mario kart is when you should put me to bed
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
OMG stoned with flashing lights behind me, I was freaking out until I realized I wasn't driving my couch
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
my underwear is inside out , I have a giant hickie. I'm wearing last nights makeup. this is going to be the best day at work ever
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
I'm either hallucinating or there is a dying cat outside my apartment....
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