did i leave my keys in your car? BTW: sorry for throwing that drink on your date.
I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
I think im going to throw up on grandma
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
His pubic hair was longer than his dick
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
He just did a 33 second keg stand with a fractured leg, busted chin and chipped teeth from running into a parked car after winning a race.
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
I'm staying in tonight, it's my Christmas present to my liver.
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
Randomize
