he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
Fuck 8am classes
Dear Jesus I'm gonna throw up through my eyes
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
Today's goal is to get out of bed, before I take a shit. This might be hard
Pass or fail tho
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
Does it still count as a valentine if it's drunk phone sex at 3 in the morning
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
Like its not even midnight and I've already had enough of her for all of 2015
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
I woke up with a pillow, shampoo and a plant in my fridge. Eggs in the toilet, and I was wearing three pairs of girls underwear. What happened last night
The problem with adderall is that no matter what I'm doing, I feel like it was the most productive thing I've EVER done.
Did you alphabetize our spice cupboard again?
...You'll thank me later.
Randomize
