Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
Turns out they use me as an example of What Not To Do at freshman orientation. My little brother told me.
she is using a fork to eat popcorn and refuses to drink gatorade out of anything but a margarita glass... did i mention the popcorn is on a plate?
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
My pubes were yanked out by the root when they got caught in the condom. I think it's time for a bikini wax.
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
I can't drink with the moms anymore. All they talk about is lactating.
nothin like your phone freezing up and sending out old booty calls at 11am on a sunday. fml.
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
Fuck it, i havent messed around in half a year. I have sexual tension with a fire hydrant.
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