We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
everyone is single if you try hard enough
Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
He's stoned as shit, eating breakfast cereal and taking a dump. All while listening to dubstep. We may never understand him.
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
The drunk fake out is her specialty. She'll agree to come with us and two seconds later we check to make sure she's still there and we see her booking it down the hall in the opposite direction.
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
You didn't say, "No." And you stole more than half of my Snickers. You owed me that dick.
Came back with a random sweatshirt, an American flag, and a for sale sign. Mission success?
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
Oh god, I forgot we had sex to Elton John
Randomize
