Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
Thanks for ditching me last night. I got a ride home from the Dominos delivery guy. You owe me 3 large pizzas.
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
I'm on a cruise to the Bahamas and this text message is gunna cost me $10 but I need you to pray on my behalf for the things I'm about to do these 2 girls and what I did last night to a 35 year old mother of 3.
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
Oh just living the dream. And by living the dream I mean drinking franzia out of a martini glass and watching family matters. Also, drinking every time Carl Winslow has a mustache and Eddie wears MC Hammer pants
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
Finished my senior thesis. How am I celebrating you ask? By drinking gas station white zif out of an empty candle holder by myself. I fucking deserve to graduate.
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
I'm her ex, so unless you're interested in her massive moral failings and open season vagina, I'm not your guy.
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