Hi Jason, it's Liz. We dont need you to pick us up anymore. I dont care if you will be here in a milisecond. And you should know im wearing really amazing shoes.
We fish bowled my car and anna told us a story about time travel and part of it had people melted into the side of a boat and i imagined them being melted into my car moaning in pain and then we got scared and thought zombies were outside and couldn't leave for a while.
I just five second ruled a donut I dropped at starbucks, everyones staring
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
She wants to go as a facebook "like" for halloween, but right now her costume looks more like the hamburger helper hand with broken fingers.
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
Nothing says "forever alone" like receiving a friendship bracelet from your parents.
Are we on the same shift tomorrow and more importantly do you want your pants back?
She handed me scissors and told me that they were the ones with the lowest probability of having been used to trim someone's pubes.
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
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