He saw my tits then looked up and yelled thank you jesus as loud as he could
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
I immediately retract my statement involving hylecopters being allowed to blow up sharks out of the water.... The idea if it is super incredible but ultimately it would be cruel and unessesary
So many Oreos I'm regretting this decision already but I'm happy at the same time...The straddle is real
Struggle. Not straddle. I'm not straddling anyone.
Dude, he wouldn't have sex with me during halftime cause we were rooting for different teams and that would be "bad juju", I had to settle for 69.
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
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