He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
I just realised I've never been sober in my apartment
You said your face felt like it was made out out of boxes and kept asking me to give you a bath.
drinking from the bathtub cause I'm too lazy to walk downstairs and too thirsty to care
He never broke character while fucking me on the neighbor's lawn. I give him a 10 for his dedication to the British accent.
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
Don't be alarmed by all the Dick cakes in the fridge. But please don't eat..i accidentally broke one in half you guys can eat that one. Its labeled free Dick
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
How's my sex life is me mastubating next to her dog. that's how it's going.
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
Coffee's working. Just killed a fly with my bare hands.\nFuck with me.
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
Randomize
