The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
it's like i need an invisible sign across my boobs that says "DOESN'T HAVE DADDY ISSUES" that only old men can see
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
You cant come. You're a Colorado native who drinks Bud over Coors. Fucking homegrown terrorist.
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
I'm truly not mad that he's at a strip club, it's that he couldn't look far enough into the future to figure out how to get himself home from one
On a scale of zero to "unmitigated disaster," how drunk is he?
My roommate just walked in with a case of beer locked himself in his room and told us he was going to masturbate his feelings away...
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
I snapchatted his face mid sex. Needless to say, I don't think I'll ever see him again.
when my phone is in portrait view you can just assume i've been watching porn. that's the only thing i want to see in full view.
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
My house exploded and with it all my pot went up in smoke.
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