the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
I had the most spectatular hardon this morning. I think it was trying to reach you in Wisconsin.
sorry for throwing an entire water bottle of vodka at you. It was very wasteful
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
The penis is a tricky weapon to use. When using it as leverage you have to make it seem emotional. I'd rather use it as a club sometimes.
nothing says "functioning mature adult" like sneaking beer out of your mom's fridge in a lunchbox
I just watched a stripper purchase $43 of Rockstar and corn nuts. Godamnit! We need helmet cams.
I threw a beer bottle at the bartender and pissed myself. Somehow, I didn't get kicked out.
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Do you remember trying to eat the shower curtain last night...?
Randomize
