please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
You're like the curious george of whores
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
How am I supposed to buy weed and pancake mix when it's raining?
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
Randomize
