I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
It's like a parade of train wrecks.
i'm surrounded by gay midgets. not sure if i'm bragging or asking you to come rescue me. wait for follow up.
I should have known there'd be issues when he included "beautiful soul" in our playlist
he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
thats why a responsible adult always keeps some facial hair just in case they need to shave a hulk hogan mustache for midget wrestling...
I had to rip your toilet paper for you...
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
He pulled a kid having a seizure out of a car and stayed with him until the ambulance came.
he what???
Not kidding. My ovaries cannot handle this shit...swear next time he'll rescue a bunch of pound puppies and hand them out to lonely orphans.
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
I am eating a fluff-a-nutter sandwich at the gym right now. I brought vodka too.
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
Randomize
