Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
Dude that chick had her name tattooed in Japanese characters between her b-cups. I kept calling her Toyota.
I sat alone in Buffalo Wild Wings eating chocolate cake on Country Western karoake night. The waiter asked me if I was ok. Twice.
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
Well, you know sobriety isn't something I like to do on the reg.
Balls deep in an Orange is the New Black marathon. Bring food and drugs.
He jizzed all over my ID badge. HR is gonna be pissed...
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
Randomize
