I just convinced a girl to drink my spit cup cuz I said it was dark beer and would get her drunk faster. I dare you to try something better.
so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
Please tell me last night did not happen and there is another reason why my phone smells like ranch sauce ahahah
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
I woke up to find a bottle of Bacardi in my shower rack. How was your night?
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
I feel like an involuntary Mother Theresa. I DON'T WANT TO BE ABSTINENT!
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
He came back with a Butterfinger and vibrator batteries. There's no refusing him now.
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
my mom walked in on me eating her out, and i can never kiss my mother again.
Randomize
