he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
Food lion is just a portal. Cheetos are the goal. Its like not banging a super hot chick cause she is french. She still has the same parts just from a different box.
Now I am going to fly my toy helicopter in the dark.
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
My sharpie cut off line was invaded last night. Where's my turtleneck?
I bit my tongue so hard I left a deep imprint. Fuck you tongue, stop getting in the way of food.
I just found 20 dollars in my vibrator box. Was it a drunken sign to myself to get more?
The appetizer at the dinner I went to tonight was Klonopin and a Bloody Mary.
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
I'm just happy stripping was the reason you fractured your hand
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