what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
no. you can't hotbox the world.
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
he started fingering my stomach rolls instead of my vag... am i really that fat?
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
Birthday was great, I got entirely too drunk and made really poor life decisions. It was everything a birthday should be.
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
I ended up naked with smirnoff caps on my nipples. Dignity is now a completely foreign concept to me.
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
Here's the "to do" list i just found on my phone: buy stripper pole, make sex playlist, buy febreeze
Randomize
