Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
The only downside so far to having a guy roommate is that when he's doing a walmart run, I just can't bring myself to ask him to pick up a pregnancy test for me. I feel like that's just too much too soon.
The dog just sneezed and it sounded like a person, after I said bless you I freaked the fuck out and got the gun
He tried to reenact Braveheart's freedom scream but got tackled by his drunk roommate who thought he was yelling that the handle he was holding up was free.
Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
I'm sitting on my couch eating a bag of marshmallows and watching someone run bare ass down the street. What has happened to my life?
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
I'm eating a block of cheese like its a sandwich in the tsa line
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
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