i have this theory that all the people in the world who dont like mayonnaise had very bad encounter with jizz once
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
My last google search last night was 'vodka swimming pool'.
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
This could help me cancel out guys. First 4 that text me get to stay in the loop. And the last one gets the boot. We'll do this til there's only one man standing
I've just never had a dinner guest strut in, go directly to my bathroom, vomit.. then come out demanding whiskey and food.
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
Given he decided my interview was a date, showed up drunk and insisted on carrying me everywhere, we weren't off to a good start.
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
Got too starbucks. 3out of the 4 girls working i have ducked and haven't ever called. My coffee has dick written on it. It may contain spit by pumpkin lattes are only once a year
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
Sunburned by dick at the nude beach. Bad. She tried to blow me. But. I. Just. Can't. Saddest day of my life.
Randomize
