i fucked some guy last night. i called him nick jonas by mistake. i'm 24.
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
Need toilet paper. Napkins suck. Slowly running out of those two and the bleeding hasn't stopped. Your cat is next
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
I think my staff loses a little bit of respect for me every time you're in town. I may have to puke at work ...again.
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
Watching Faye Reagan porn all weekend for St Patty's day. Nothing has ever seemed more appropriate.
I am all the way hung over and want nothing more in this world than a McMuffin. Happy day after Thanksgiving.
Dude, don't beat around the bush. We're fucked and you know it.
Randomize
