I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
Okay so if I'm going to keep referring to my hangover in the third person it needs a name.
to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy
My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
is it sad that i can describe this night as "the night that i was sober" and we all know which night it was. like literally one night of sobriety.
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
I don't care how much you're grieving a loss, masturbating off the side of a roof is not acceptable mourning behavior.
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
I don't know. I'm drunk and dressed as a pirate but ill do the math tomorrow morning.
Welcome to the club of "Sick of cleaning up actual shit." We meet on the 3rd Sunday of each month. Bring your ceremonial viking helmet.
I just want to say that I've always loved you and you are my best friend ever
You gave that creepy guy my number, didn't you? You really need to learn how to just say no, not interested.
I often wonder if we’re introverted extroverts, but I don’t think so. I think we’re just easily tired scumbags
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