I thnk I just saw a monkey walking a drunk guy.
If I would have known that wiping my dick on her pillow would have caused her to leave........
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
This is your morning-after text courtesy of your very confused friend!! :) To discuss "what the hell were you trying to tell me last night," press 1. To laugh over your drunken antics, press 2. To pretend like none of it even happened (or to respond with concurrent confusion because you have no idea), press 3.
All I want to do is shower, but there is a keg in there.
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
I swear I get as excited about the sound of a condom wrapper as my cat gets when she's getting a can of food.
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
I'm going to force her to break up with me this week. Tonight I plan to shit the bed. If that doesn't work I'm not sure what's next.
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