So the last day on the vacation I woke up in the bath tub. My mom said she asked me during the night what I was doing and I said, "swimming."
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
you inspire me to be a worse person
Listening to Whitney Houston sing the National Anthem while I shit before going out tonight. America.
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
The body is still out there. I don't think my trainer realized when he asked me not to drink for 24 days, how often I see dead people
my roomie eats chipotle far too often. when i was looking for a bag to throw up in I had my choice of a wlamart bag and 10 chipotle bags
I'm currently watching porn and playing beer pong with wine in the lobby of a hotel with a squadron of hot airforce guys. You can never say your life is better than mine again
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
Randomize
